Why Men Disengage from Church - David Murrow

Key Takeaways 1. Church has long been perceived as “unmanly” (00:01:29) For centuries, attending church signaled a step away from traditional markers of masculinity, creating a deep-rooted gender gap that still influences men today. 2. Emotionalism unintentionally pushes men away (00:04:51) When spiritual maturity is measured by visible emotion, many men feel like they can’t compete—leading to discomfort, disengagement, or withdrawal. 3. Men are quietly disengaging during worship (00:06:04) Most men aren’t actively participating—they’re standing silently, enduring services that don’t connect with how they’re wired. 4. Faith has been framed with predominantly “feminine-coded” values (00:08:22) The church often emphasizes relational and emotional traits while underrepresenting strength, purpose, and achievement—values many men resonate with. 5. Churches train passivity instead of action (00:13:42) The modern church experience often centers on sitting and consuming, rather than engaging men in active, embodied discipleship. 6. Language and worship style can create disconnect (00:18:01) Romanticized language in worship songs can feel unnatural to men, making it harder for them to genuinely engage. 7. Men need embodied, active discipleship (00:29:30) Transformation happens when men do, not just hear—through challenge, movement, and shared experience, not just teaching. 8. The future of discipleship is continuous, not weekly (00:33:50) Reaching men today requires ongoing engagement—meeting them where they already are with consistent, practical content throughout the week. https://davidmurrow.com/ Do all of the following at https://entrustingthefaith.com/  Sign up for the newsletter Contact me about speaking opportunities Buy the book Leading Well at Home: Husbands and Fathers Can Biblically Lead Their Families