57. Lauren Ritchie on the Coachability of Today's Kids

What does it actually mean for a kid to be coachable? Because, spoiler alert, it doesn't necessarily mean they're quiet, obedient, or willing to do exactly what they're told. In this episode, we're joined by the brilliant Lauren Ritchie, a mindset and mental skills educator, speaker, choreographer and teacher, for a big, honest conversation about raising kids who can take feedback, work through frustration, own their mistakes and keep going when things get hard. And honestly, this conversation went ALL over the place in the best possible way. We talked about dance, parenting, education, studio culture, social media, boundaries, goal setting, difficult conversations, and why sometimes the best thing we can do for our kids is… not fix the problem for them. Lauren challenges the old-school idea that being coachable means compliance or submission. Instead, she describes a genuinely coachable dancer as someone who is open, curious, willing to reflect, adapt and take ownership. And then there's the flower analogy. Every correction is a flower. You can ignore it. You can take it and shove it in your dance bag. Or you can actually put it in water, give it sunlight and take care of it. We LOVE this one. A few things we unpack: 🌸 Coachable doesn't mean compliant. Being coachable isn't about becoming a robot who blindly follows instructions. It's about being open enough to ask questions, understand the why and actually use the feedback. 🌸 Connect before you correct. Kids are much more able to learn, grow and receive feedback when they feel safe, seen and connected to the adult in the room. 🌸 Your teacher doesn't have to be your best friend. There can be warmth, kindness and respect while still maintaining professional boundaries. In fact, those boundaries can make the coaching relationship stronger. 🌸 Feedback isn't a judgement of your worth. A correction is about something you can work on. It isn't evidence that you're bad at dancing, that you don't belong or that your teacher doesn't like you. 🌸 Stop rescuing kids from every uncomfortable feeling. Frustration, disappointment and struggle aren't automatically problems to solve. Sometimes they're part of the learning process. 🌸 Goals aren't magic wishes. Wanting a skill is only the beginning. Real goal setting involves monitoring, consistency, benchmarks, obstacles, adjustments and doing the boring broccoli work in between. 🌸 Parents can support without becoming the coach. Instead of immediately jumping in to fix the problem, try asking, "What are your options?" or "What could you ask your teacher to understand this better?" 🌸 Culture doesn't happen by accident. If we want coachable kids, resilient dancers and healthy studio communities, the adults have to model those things too. And perhaps one of our favourite reminders from the episode: "I care about who they are, not what they do." Because yes, we'd love the turns, the flexibility, the tricks and the beautiful routines. But we're raising humans first. And for the parents… If your child comes home frustrated about feedback, your first job doesn't have to be fixing it. You can listen. You can validate that it felt hard. You can give them a hug. And then, when they're ready, you can get curious together about what comes next. Sometimes the most powerful thing we can say is: "I'm on your team. Let's figure this out." And Lauren's other very important life advice? Do not trust an emotion after 9 p.m. Honestly, put that one on a T-shirt. 😂