"Are You Gay?", Dash Cam Frat Boys, and the Matilda Cake with Miranda Batterson

This week on Tongue First, Siren and Wendy welcome Miranda Batterson: an Uber driver in Florida, a mom to a nine-year-old gamer named Cooper, and one of the TikTok community friends who became a real-life friend. If the name sounds familiar, Miranda is married to Melissa Batterson, better known as Mother Clucker, who joined us last week for Episode 21. Yes, she's the one who got back in her Honda Civic. Miranda's coming out story starts on a recliner at sixteen, when her mom looked up from the TV and asked, "Are you gay?" Her answer, "I think so," got her banned from sleepovers at the house of any girl who was out, so she did what any teenager would do and stopped telling her mom who was gay. She talks about keeping a spare set of clothes in her school locker, being told for years that it was a phase, and how she's still figuring out how she identifies. She also gets honest about the flirting. Miranda tells us the exact moment she realized she wanted to flirt with Siren on purpose (it involved a pudding cup and no spoon), and she's clear that the friendship matters more to her than any of it. Then it's Uberland: what it's like to be visibly queer in Florida while driving strangers around, the riders who have no idea who they're tipping, and the college boys who asked for their own dash cam footage. She also talks about raising Cooper with two moms in a red state, a school that has him make two Mother's Day gifts, why the family is headed for North Carolina, and what her sixteen-year-old self would say about the life she has now. Also: Wendy's "snacky snack" nickname, a kitchen clock that plays "Killing Me Softly" on the hour and may be haunted by her grandmother, and the Matilda cake that her wife drove to three bakeries to find. If you've ever come out in a place that wasn't ready for you, or needed to hear that the sixteen-year-old version of you made it, this one is for you. Support the chaos and get access to bonus content, behind the scenes moments, and the Tongue First After Hours community over on Patreon. The link is in the show notes. Follow the chaos on TikTok: @Sirenegade_440 @Wendy6181981 New episodes every Monday. Until next time — stay curious, stay queer, and don't forget to lick responsibly.