The Tenacity Podcast Epi 23 Part 1: Why We Don't Go To Church Anymore

Patrick was a pastor for seven years. Maddie came to faith as an adult. They found a church they loved, with the best preacher Patrick had ever heard, and they told the pastors their entire history before they ever volunteered for anything. The criminal trial. The false accusations. The not-guilty verdict. Every pastor there knew, and every one of them said it would not be a problem. Then one couple in their small group looked them up, said they were uncomfortable, and the pastor called Patrick and Maddie in. Not to defend them. To tell them to go. This is Part 1 of a two-part conversation about why the Martinezes stopped going to church. Patrick tells it plainly: the meeting where he cried in front of those men, the walk across the parking lot, and the slow realization over the months that followed that there was no other church waiting for them. They visited others. They sat through a worship set that was all me, a youth pastor who promised that a bigger tithe would sell their house, and a sermon on fear from a woman whose worst moment was getting separated from her tour group at the pyramids, delivered to a couple who had spent fifteen months not knowing if he was going to prison. They are not telling anyone else to leave. If you have a church you love, keep it. This is their story and the three reasons behind it. Part 2 goes into the scripture and the theology. Chapters00:00 It's not about right and wrong, somebody complained00:20 Welcome00:56 Reason one, we got kicked out01:51 The church our friends brought us to03:02 The best preacher I ever heard05:43 We bought in, and I wanted to serve again06:50 We told the pastors everything08:39 The first day I ran sound, I cried10:02 A prayer request in small group11:04 One couple looked us up12:25 I was devastated. I was heartbroken.13:20 Church hurt, and who it belongs to14:15 Reason two, there wasn't another church for us15:07 A service that was wrong start to finish16:53 The youth pastor whose tithe sold his house17:38 The tithe is not in the New Testament19:27 A sermon about fear20:43 What do you know about fear?21:54 It's a business22:36 Twenty hours a week, for free23:55 The church is a greenhouse24:39 So I rewrote the book25:23 Why we don't call ourselves Christians26:58 We've grown more since we left29:19 What people in crisis actually need31:34 Not our target audience32:29 More in common with people in recovery34:29 We're not deconstructing36:05 Reason three, the Lord hasn't told us to go back The Tenacity Podcast is Patrick and Maddie Martinez, a podcast for couples about marriage, family and getting through a crisis together. Free 30 minute call with Patrick: call.pem.coach #church #churchhurt #leavingchurch #faith #christianity #christianmarriage #marriage #relationships #tithing #deconstruction #tenacitypodcast #patrickemartinez