The Tenacity Podcast Ep 19 :Why I Got A Divorce: Reaction to Divorcetok

A woman posts a story time about why she left her husband. It gets millions of views and a comment section full of people telling her she did the right thing. Patrick and Maddie Martinez watch the whole thing and keep running into the same problem: almost none of the story is actually there. Patrick is a relationship coach, and his first move with any client is an hour of questions before a single piece of advice. So that is what this episode is. What did he actually say. What did she actually hear. Why did he not want her staying at her parents' house. What does the word abuse mean, and does anything described here meet it. Maddie takes the friend's side of it: how do you listen to someone in pain without either dismissing them or handing them a divorce. CHAPTERS00:00 Welcome, and the viral TikTok we are reacting to00:15 Her story: gallbladder surgery and a week and a half away02:46 What is missing from this story03:14 The questions a real friend would ask04:43 Patrick's coaching call: 50 minutes of listening first05:50 Why you need to hear his side too07:21 Judging a marriage on one person's account08:43 What respect actually means10:38 When concern gets heard as criticism12:38 He failed in the moment, and what he should have said13:21 A communication problem, not a divorce problem14:01 Choosing to love when you want to withdraw16:40 The problem with "love wouldn't do this"17:34 260,000 likes and one side of the story19:49 She calls it abuse, and Patrick defines the word21:55 "You would have to be the one to leave me"22:53 Rewriting the marriage after you have already decided24:51 Praying for direction and hearing what you want26:15 Disrespect: never asking why he objected27:38 The panic attack in the car30:08 Wrapping up ABOUT THE SHOWThe Tenacity Podcast is hosted by Patrick Martinez, relationship coach, with his wife and co-host Maddie Martinez. Marriage, relationships, and the work of staying in it. Free course, Should We Stay Together?, and the full Survive & Thrive program are both at PatrickEMartinez.com/relationship-rescue#marriage #divorce #relationshipadvice #marriageadvice #tenacitypodcast